If I had to be entirely truthful, I'd have said that the delicate art of giving a surprise, of planning and preparing, of calculating and culminating, is more my forte than his (look back to December if you think I'm being boastful). That butterfly-ey flutter of jittery anticipation in the moments before a surprise is revealed is a sensation hard to beat. The only better thing in life? Probably being on the receiving end. One surprise after another, I feel like I've been blown out of the water recently, whether it's random trips to Westfield with even random-er gifts appearing in my shopping bags, or surprise dinner dates here and there. It was only last week that the bf picked me up after work and sped me off "somewhere secret" for a meal (Blue Ginger, more info to follow I promise) - In truth, I feel completely and utterly spoilt, well beyond anything I thought I deserved.
But it's only recently that I've been able to muster the courage, really muster the courage to appreciate the happiness that has come to me, rather than live in fear that one day it will be gone. I don't know if I'm waffling (sorry if I am) but predominately, this week, my thoughts have centred around surprises. And it does surprise me, often, how close we have to get to losing something before we really understand its value in our life - be it love, life, family, health or even money. We take these privileges for granted and assume they are rightfully ours; when in truth, each one of them and every single day is a gift that many others are denied. Down and out last year, I remember itching for an iPhone, pleading and pledging eternal gratitude (to whom, I'm not sure) if I could have mine back again. Look at me now - I throw it around in my bag without a protector, leave it lying around and lose it on almost a weekly basis. Same for the iMac. I'd walk by the Apple store day after day, coveting after the shiny 27'' screen, willing that it would appear, as if by magic, in my bedroom. But it was months of arduous savings and calculated thriftiness that enabled me to afford mine, my baby, one of the loves in my life; yet today I bat not an eyelid when I enter my room. It's just there. As though it always has been, always will be. It all sounds cliché but really, my message is just to live life like nothing is a given. I've learnt the hard way - I just hope you'll take the heads-up because the contentment you'll feel is absolutely priceless.