I sense the onset of a rant, so I'm going to try and keep it short. I've spent a good weekend. A busy weekend, in the company of good friends, close family and wonderful food. Company after all, is the only way to banish loneliness. And as of… ooh, about two month ago, this realisation dawned. And so I purposefully keep myself surrounded by people so as to prevent my mind from wondering off onto tangents that are, really, no good for me. And chit-chat, YouTubing, movie-watching, being engrossed and engaged in conversation that's mentally stimulating really does work wonders in keeping the mind occupied. It distracts me away from the constant, niggling worries, and brimming negativity post break-up. It puts a little perspective on things y'know - talking about the news and other larger-scale happenings makes you realise that there are people out there who've got it SO much worse. And so I guess that's the caption for yesterday's video; when I'm in a state of absolute despair and despondency, it's long afternoons at my best friend's house that snap me out of it. Cooking and eating with his family, chilling out with his sister… being shown random videos like these, and talking about anything and everything from politics to Peter Pan, from history to Harry Potter. If there's any reason I haven't completely lost my mind, it's him.
Sometimes, when I really think about it, I come to realise that I don't think anything can possibly prepare us for the harsh truths adult life throws our way. It's hard not to feel disappointed. Betrayed. We spend our childhood, joyfully, weaving a colourful web of dreams, hatching a complex system of plans and ambitions. I'm going to be this, I'm going to go there and I'm going to do that. I speak at risk of sounding bitter, but really, nobody warns us that there'll come a time when dreams will be replaced by worries, plans by bills. When you won't choose what do with your life, but life will choose what to do with you. I generally subscribe to the "glass is half-full" school of thought, but even so - looking around me, I don't think I'm alone in my slight fury at the current situation. And while it's difficult to attribute this frustration to any singular occurrence, it's not so difficult to reel off a list of contributing factors. Graduates can't find jobs and families can't afford holidays. The elderly can't afford heating and the youth can't afford housing. Prices are rising yet wages are falling. Take a rush hour tube and the atmosphere is so tense you could slice through it with a knife. Riots rocking the city, cuts discrediting the government and uncertainty seeping into every corner of society. It just feels like a big deceit. A disappointment. A shame that we have to grow up.
I agree that times are tough but I do think that a lot of young people today - people from my generation - have grown up with a sense of entitlement which has only inevitably set them up for disappointment. "If you dream hard enough, anything is possible" was the mantra of my childhood (you hear it in any Disney movie) but the reality is that you can only achieve your dreams through hard work and perseverance. I come from a stereotypical 'under-privileged' background but I have always worked hard - I worked two jobs for most of my school life, I even cleaned toilets so I could afford lunch - and now I've come out the other end, an Oxford graduate with a secure, highly paid job lined up for when I'm done studying. Achieving that was, and still is, a constant struggle. I never felt entitled to it. I always realised achieving my dream of becoming a lawyer would be hard work and take unwavering determination. Unfortunately, it appears that many young people today - especially those from less privileged backgrounds - don't realise that, in the competitive world we live in, they can't expect a job to fall on their lap. It takes hard work. And if you can't get the job of your dreams then you clean toilets in the meantime, like I did.
ReplyDeleteThank you for this thought-provoking post xxx
I definitely agree with you there. People do seem to think they're entitled to something more - London riots seem to testify for that greedy mentality. But we aren't owned anything. And hard work is the only way forward... but even so, as you say - Disney movies tell us that if we "dream hard enough, anything is possible". They don't necessarily prepare us for the hardships life throw our way though. It takes time to realise, and then find your feet all at the same time. Hats off to you girl, you are definitely a shining example of how to go out there and get what you want!
ReplyDeleteYou have an absolutely wonderful blog by the way - I have been reading for some time! :) xx
ReplyDelete